When you rediscover yourself it is like re-igniting the fire that is within you.
The words “being single” and “being complete” don’t usually fall into the same sentence. The world says that being single means you are incomplete and that having a significant other is what makes you “complete.”
I beg to differ.
I believed this lie my whole life as well as many other women. I’m here to share what I have beautifully discovered while being single, and that is that I have been FOUND.
I firmly believe that we women lose ourselves. We try so hard to fit the mold of what we believe a guy wants. We will give wife benefits when he hasn’t even given us any kind of title because we’re trying to prove that we are worthy of being loved and given a “title.” We fall into the lie that if we just freely give a man all our time, energy, emotions and all of us then he will love us more. We end up losing ourselves in trying to be loved. We are treasures! Our worth is so high that we deserve to be sought out and found. We cannot make a man love us or expect to find our worth in a man. We cannot keep giving so much power over to men because no man can fill us. Only God can. Once we realize this, our relationships will be so much healthier and whole.
A diamond has to be found first. It doesn’t have to prove that it is a precious jewel.
We so badly want to be FOUND as the treasures we are that we end up being LOST.
I had lost myself in shame, hurt, and never feeling “good enough.” I found myself in complete brokenness. I kept trying to fill these voids with temporary “void fillers.”
The minute I let go of the things and people that weren’t helping me to be a better person I was then able to start on this beautiful journey of finding myself.
Every woman wants to be wanted and desired. I understand that completely, but we will never fully be fulfilled if we do not know that God created us for a purpose and our worth is that, “We are worth far more than rubies.” (Proverbs 31) Our worth is not in people’s opinions or a man wanting us. If we put our worth in that then we will forever be on a roller coaster of emotions, and we will have nothing firm to stand on.
The beauty of God’s love for us is that it’s constant. It never fails. It’s never shaken. It never changes. No matter what we do, say, or feel, God’s perfect love remains the same for us. When we understand that we are LOVED and born with PURPOSE then nothing around us can take the worth that we have. No matter what people say to us or about us, we can all come to a place of knowing it doesn’t change our worth. We are human. We are going to mess up. Thank God for His grace. We are forgiven, loved, and good enough in God’s eyes. He doesn’t expect us to be perfect.
What is your purpose on this earth?
~God created everyone with a purpose. You are not an accident.
Who do you believe you are and does it align with who God says you are that you are enough, loved, and worth it?
~I used to believe I was damaged, tainted, too broken to be fixed. What we believe about ourselves is who we become. So because I believed I was trash and worthless which does NOT align with who God says I am, I found myself doing things that I knew deep down wasn’t who I was, but I had stooped down to a level of believing that I had no future for myself.
Our worth is so much MORE than what we see. Since I have found my true worth, no amount of money, wealth, or possessions could EVER amount to it.
What kind of woman do you want to be?
~Your mess becomes your message! I had to start from rock bottom. I had to do a complete self evaluation and ask myself these questions. I have always had this longing to be an encourager and motivational speaker. I love people, and I love hard. I truly believe in others. I decided I want to help women know their worth. So I began this journey of challenging myself to RISE. Rise above it all. I had everything working against me. People love to bring up your past and shove it right in your face especially when you decide you want to change your life for the better. I had to find out who my real friends were. God quickly removed everyone from my life that weren’t supposed to be in it, and He replaced them with the most incredible friends I could ever ask for. It took time though. I had to be okay with being alone. I had to learn to be okay with not being popular or liked because I was on this new journey of finding my worth, and I couldn’t expect people to understand it. It’s been a process of almost a year now of healing to happen and slowly allowing every mask to peel off. It has been ugly and messy, but beautiful because I am becoming a woman I never imagined I could be.
What are dreams/visions you want to accomplish?
~I believe we all dream about and plan what we want to be and accomplish in our life. From a young age, dreams and visions start to grow inside of our hearts. You go to school, learn and get degrees all focused on becoming who you think you want to be. Majority of women I talk to though are not going after the dream they want to go after. There are many reasons and road blocks that can be in our life that are keeping us from pursuing what we truly want to pursue. It’s hard. I want to encourage you to write down those dreams and visions you have. Maybe there are dreams from years ago that need to be awakened. Maybe you want to start a business. Maybe you want to go back to school. Maybe you want to write a book. Maybe you want to do something with performing arts. You can do ANYTHING you set your mind to! Start a list and start thinking of ways you can work toward it. Persevere and don’t give up until you can check it off your list.
I’m here to challenge the women who are reading this blog and feeling like they have lost themselves. I encourage you to FIND YOURSELF! I found myself, and now I am able to walk in my destiny. In order to fully walk in your destiny and purpose you need to know who you are and KNOW YOUR WORTH. Sometimes it means starting from rock bottom, but at rock bottom the only way is up!
It’s time to love YOU. Take care of YOU. Be kind to YOU. Know YOU.
It’s time to rediscover YOU.